Splat!

Yes, I hate buses, but I hate stupid people even more...and I hate dangerous people with a passion. While waiting 2 feet from the edge of the sidewalk with my bus rolling in only a few yards away some jerkoff decided that it was entirely appropriate to push me closer to the edge to make room for him to pass. Seeing the sideview mirror coming straight for me I immediately ducked just enough to feel it brush the top of my tuque. Had I not been so vigilant then eYe wuD b riteing 2deis Blug lyke DIs. Narrowly escaping a sudden drop in IQ I immediately yelled at the idiot "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING FLARKHEAD!"

Jerkoff turned and was about to rant something back at me when two other people who saw this jumped in and ruined my fun. "You almost killed the guy!", "What's the matter with you!" and he backed off. Too bad because at that moment I was ready to fire my right missile at his clueless head. I got on the bus and the driver looked pale,"Are you alright sir?" he asked. "Just fit to be tied right now" was my only response which surprisingly landed a few chuckles.

I'm still wondering if this waste of oxygen even realises what he did and how close he came to seriously reducing my revenue and increasing my drool potentials or even affecting my skull's talent for containing grey matter. He might even think that he was right to do what he did and we may yet see the disturbing headline about some poor shmuck who got brained.